I'm sick of this topic
Mar. 7th, 2003 04:49 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
talktoolooseSo, Brodski wrote back. Strangely, my first reaction to his letter was that he was right and I was over-reacting. But then I re-read it. I am resisting the temptation to analyze his letter back to him, but I will do it here.
"Oh stop being so touchy and petulant and self-centred and humourless! Just as well I'm not a psychiatrist of the analytical school, or I might say something unkinder, to do with 'protesting too much'."
- Yes, the proper response to in-your-face racism is to grin and bear it. The fact that I respond with any more than a good-humoured wink shows that I really am a materialist Christ-killer and I know it.
"If you were so 'shocked' the more dignified and manly response would have been to keep quiet. And not too much talk about 'racism', please, I've passed myself off a couple of times and heard what's said about the goyim behind closed doors. I could have made a fuss too, instead of just smiling behind a hand."
- Again, the more 'manly' approach to hatred is to silently accept it. Good idea. And god forbid we should use the word 'racism'. It's just so PUSHY and WHINY! Next thing you'll know, I'll be demanding all kinds of equal rights! If I understand correctly, you've heard Jews make anti-goyish comments. Well, then! Their racism certainly excuses yours. And cheers to you on the MANLY way you smile behind your hand.
"For Pete's sake, a light passing observation on certain characteristics universally commented on is not an affront to your blood, or something!"
- Universally commented on. Yeah, like those shiftless, lazy niggers and those inscrutible chinks who steal our jobs away. Must be true if it's universally commented on.
"I'm a great respecter of anyone's traditions and beliefs, but if they have to be professed too stridently one might begin to doubt the genuineness. And incidentally, though it's not a good analogy, I wouldn't mind at all anyone saying that he or she didn't like 'homosexuals', I don't like quite a few of them myself, especially those vociferous types who insist that everyone has to be - they give a very bad impression, and it's quite understandable that they should be objected to."
- Perhaps even beaten and tied to a fence to die.
"I agree that there have been injustices, but that's just the way of the world, one has to put up with it and try and counteract it by giving a good example; I've never myself encountered any of them of that sort, perhaps that has been my good fortune, or perhaps it is that I don't go around looking for them."
- or perhaps you don't have anyone who historically hates your people. At least no one who has been able to do anything about that hatred.
"I don't believe in 'categories' to do with personal tastes or origins or hair colour or whatever, only in two, good or bad, relatively speaking. The rest is personal opinions and experiences and upbringing and all those things, potentially instructive to others. And please don't spit in my face when I make a sincere effort to apologise if I inadvertently offended; otherwise you have a real quarrel on your hands."
- uh oh.
"I've enjoyed and been interested in our talks, why is that not enough to establish a basis for a solider understanding and friendship, without dragging in all these other irrelevant neuroses?"
- Yeah, it's funny. I'm tempted to say the same. His earlier comment that I should stop being politically correct hit home because I've see the thoughtless stupidities of that movement and had them used against me (yes, I've been called a racist! I'll tell you that amusing story sometime). But smiling behind my hand as someone equates a race with various negative characteristics and a gay man who is so blind to the human consequences of homophobia that he doesn't see the difference between disliking some homosexuals and someone who doesn't like 'homosexuals" is not worth my trouble.
Clearly he's worth this much trouble, eh? But I need to work through this. There is a definite level of shame I feel that is brought to the surface by having to defend myself. That's self-hatred, folks, and it's not healthy. And defending myself in this tiniest of battles is healthy.
So, that's my story.
Last chance: do I send him the above replies or not?
"Oh stop being so touchy and petulant and self-centred and humourless! Just as well I'm not a psychiatrist of the analytical school, or I might say something unkinder, to do with 'protesting too much'."
- Yes, the proper response to in-your-face racism is to grin and bear it. The fact that I respond with any more than a good-humoured wink shows that I really am a materialist Christ-killer and I know it.
"If you were so 'shocked' the more dignified and manly response would have been to keep quiet. And not too much talk about 'racism', please, I've passed myself off a couple of times and heard what's said about the goyim behind closed doors. I could have made a fuss too, instead of just smiling behind a hand."
- Again, the more 'manly' approach to hatred is to silently accept it. Good idea. And god forbid we should use the word 'racism'. It's just so PUSHY and WHINY! Next thing you'll know, I'll be demanding all kinds of equal rights! If I understand correctly, you've heard Jews make anti-goyish comments. Well, then! Their racism certainly excuses yours. And cheers to you on the MANLY way you smile behind your hand.
"For Pete's sake, a light passing observation on certain characteristics universally commented on is not an affront to your blood, or something!"
- Universally commented on. Yeah, like those shiftless, lazy niggers and those inscrutible chinks who steal our jobs away. Must be true if it's universally commented on.
"I'm a great respecter of anyone's traditions and beliefs, but if they have to be professed too stridently one might begin to doubt the genuineness. And incidentally, though it's not a good analogy, I wouldn't mind at all anyone saying that he or she didn't like 'homosexuals', I don't like quite a few of them myself, especially those vociferous types who insist that everyone has to be - they give a very bad impression, and it's quite understandable that they should be objected to."
- Perhaps even beaten and tied to a fence to die.
"I agree that there have been injustices, but that's just the way of the world, one has to put up with it and try and counteract it by giving a good example; I've never myself encountered any of them of that sort, perhaps that has been my good fortune, or perhaps it is that I don't go around looking for them."
- or perhaps you don't have anyone who historically hates your people. At least no one who has been able to do anything about that hatred.
"I don't believe in 'categories' to do with personal tastes or origins or hair colour or whatever, only in two, good or bad, relatively speaking. The rest is personal opinions and experiences and upbringing and all those things, potentially instructive to others. And please don't spit in my face when I make a sincere effort to apologise if I inadvertently offended; otherwise you have a real quarrel on your hands."
- uh oh.
"I've enjoyed and been interested in our talks, why is that not enough to establish a basis for a solider understanding and friendship, without dragging in all these other irrelevant neuroses?"
- Yeah, it's funny. I'm tempted to say the same. His earlier comment that I should stop being politically correct hit home because I've see the thoughtless stupidities of that movement and had them used against me (yes, I've been called a racist! I'll tell you that amusing story sometime). But smiling behind my hand as someone equates a race with various negative characteristics and a gay man who is so blind to the human consequences of homophobia that he doesn't see the difference between disliking some homosexuals and someone who doesn't like 'homosexuals" is not worth my trouble.
Clearly he's worth this much trouble, eh? But I need to work through this. There is a definite level of shame I feel that is brought to the surface by having to defend myself. That's self-hatred, folks, and it's not healthy. And defending myself in this tiniest of battles is healthy.
So, that's my story.
Last chance: do I send him the above replies or not?
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2003-03-07 05:24 pm (UTC)I've never really understood anti-semitism, in Europe/America anyway. In places like the middle east, where you have two religious groups contesting the same territory, it's easy enough to understand why they hate each other, even if you don't share the sentiment. Likewise, while I'm certainly not anti-Japanese or anti-German, I understand those feelings as memories of previous atrocities.
And any minority--religious, racial, sexual--definitely has reason to at least be wary of the majority, because that majority has the power to make lives miserable if it so desires.
If only the whole world were like Austin-- I live within 2 blocks of: a muslim community center, a jewish community center, a catholic dayschool, and a progressive baptist church*, and Austin has yet to become a staging ground for any sort of holy war.
On an unrelated note, I remember something in Annie Hall where Woody Allen was stressing over meeting his girlfriend's whitebread protestant parents. Something about worrying that on hearing he was a Jewish New Yorker, they'd think he was a "socialist, homosexual pornographer."
It struck me that a gay Jewish socialist pornographer from New York is pretty much what I'd consider marriage material. Making revolutionary gay porn for the edification of the Working Man in New York with my boyfriend would be the best thing ever.
*Progressive to the point that they welcome homos as full members, with none of that hate the sin bullshit. They got kicked out of the nat'l baptist assembly for this, just like they did when they started treating women as full members, and non-white people as full members as well. Eventually the Baptist majority got shamed into following the Austin Baptists' lead in those other cases.
no subject
Date: 2003-03-07 05:33 pm (UTC)The International Jewish Conspiracy for the Loving of Sweet, Sweet Booty is really slacking off lately. Is there somewhere I can register a complaint?
Hubba hubba
Date: 2003-03-09 08:38 am (UTC)Amusing in-your-faceness: Marc Ribot, avant-guitar god who has played with John Zorn, Tom Waits, Elvis Costello and others put out a disc on Zorn's Tzadik label (which releases fringe, experimental Jewish music) called, "Yo! I Killed Your God!"
Anyway, rest assured, you're doing nothing to avert my crush on you; come to Canada sometime. ("Avert" is the wrong word, but I can't think of a better one now.)
Also, you have inspired me to have a t-shirt made that says "Socialist Jewish Pornographer". Or, perhaps, "Commie Jew Fag".
Also, you would really enjoy Richard Goldstein's "The Attack Queers" which I referred to in my post. It's bringing up my radical juices again.
no subject
Date: 2003-03-07 07:56 pm (UTC)Unless you wish to turn his … "education" into your own personal crusade, no, don't send the above replies. Don't send anything. Ever. Again. Just drop the line of communication.
Unless you feel you have the time and inclination to school 'im, yo.
The only reason I can see that would make your efforts and time well-spent is if you were to take the conversation/conversion and use it as a public example — as you are doing now — so if that's the case, then don't drop the ball.
xo.
Higher Education
Date: 2003-03-09 08:40 am (UTC)xoxo
commiejewfag