Troy, Troy Again

A last word about this stupid movie. Remember I said yesterday how you have to do the whole cousin-in-quotes thing with Achilles and Patroclus? It's worse than that! Structurally, the story only makes sense if Patroclus is Achilles lover. He goes ballistic and faces down the freaking walls of Troy shouting "Stella! Stella!" oops, "Hector! Hector!" and he's all determined-like and lionine (cool helmet there -- the only nice bit of design in the whole movie).

The situation perfectly parallels Paris starting the whole mess by taking off with Helen because love is the only thing these passionate people see, not all that politics stuff. Achilles, with his whole hate-on for Agammemnon's war only becomes engaged (to Ag's delight) when he has to avenge his lover. In fact, this again plays into the King's agenda, just like Paris and Helen did. If Patroclus is not his lover, it's just:

"You killed my cousin who I used to play Power Rangers with. I will take on you and your army and VENGEANCE AND GLORY WILL BE MINE!!!"

Yeah, right.