Swept Up in the Zeitgeist!

When Snake and I were clearing US customs on the way to Florida, we became an official, international set of spouses. Please send wedding presents.

As we lined up, we decided to fill in two customs forms though it called for "one per family". This was sort of a no-brainer for us as it's how we've always entered the Altered States of America. After all, it was only ten years ago that it was still legal for any customs officer to arbitrarily ban any lesbian or gay person from entering the US (thanks to Rep. Barney Franks for fighting that battle).

But as we stood in front of the hunky border guard, he started asking what our relationship was. As I hesitated for a moment, he began throwing options at me: "friends? colleagues?" and, suddenly seeing any prevarication as ridiculous and self-diminishing, I looked him in the eye and said "Spouses. We're spouses." And with the simple recitation of this word, we entered the United Snakes as couple. I wish I'd had a bouquet to throw.

It's funny how the zeitgeist catches you in its zephyrs. All the gay marriage stuff is interesting to me as a rights phenomenon and for its ability to expose people's hatreds and nobilities. But I also find it retrogressive in the way it reinforces monogamy and nesting as the only mode of human love that one should aspire to. Furthermore, I don't even believe that it's the best approach to take for obtaining rights for the largest number of diverse people and for actually advancing societal attitudes and growth.

Nonetheless, I felt somewhat elated afterwards and said my traditional pre-flight plane-crash sentimental "I love you" with even more teary gusto than usual.

Correspondence with a Hero

One of my LJ interests is a science fiction writer named Maureen F. McHugh whom few have heard of. I stumbled across her rather downscale webpage about a month ago and, yesterday, decided to drop her a note:

Subject: Small Fannish Genuflection

I came across your humble web-page and just wanted to say that I have enjoyed all your novels tremendously. The clarity and grace of your prose and the unique structuring of your novels appeal to me greatly. Furthermore, you are a writer who is not afraid of sadness and you remove the stigma from that rich emotion. I love the voyages of discovery that your characters make -- from Zhang's unexpected discovery of his talents to Janna's equally unexpected travels through geography, technology and gender. It saddens me that more people don't know your books and I recommend them whenever I can. Best wishes, TTL Toronto, Canada

Well! She just wrote back!

TTL Thank you so much. It matters a great deal to me when someone sends me a note. Often it feels as if I have spent a year or two or more on a book and then it goes out into the world and I don't know what happens. So I treasure when a voice comes back out of the wide world and says, 'I hear you.' Maureen

Now, do I have the guts to write to my first love?