Days of Becoming, Chapter 18

[talktooloose]

Title: Days of Becoming, Chapter 18 - “Let the Statue of Liberty See What Lies Inland”
Author: Talktooloose
'Verse: X-Men movieverse
Warnings: Explicit sex, swearing, bad rap, flame wars and, uh, explicit sex.

Betas: kuria_dalmatia, mofic and lux_apollo: Passionate, precise and indispensible.
Disclaimers: Marvel and 20th Century own this stuff but they do stupid stunts like killing off Cyclops and cancelling New X-Men. No actors were harmed in the making of this fic including Susan Sarandon, Tim Robbins and Chad Michael Murray who appear without permission.

Series Summary: This novel focusses mainly on the paths Iceman and Pyro take on their way to adulthood and how they discover and deal with their love for each other. It is a novel about what Joni Mitchell calls "the dream's malfunction" and how we can learn to make our own dreams when our heroes fail us. Other X characters (including ones from comicverse and elsewhere) and OC's play prominent roles and the action begins before X1, continues through the events of X2 and X3 and concludes in the aftermath of that movie.

Chapter Summary: The mutant protest goes ahead in New York but Bobby and John have their reasons for missing out. John shares secrets with Jean and Kitty and questions Bobby's feelings. Featuring Forge and his amazing gadgets! Also, the return of a missing OC!

Sorry for the delay but I took on a stupid freelance job that is eating my brain. Also, the chapter is the longest yet and took a long time to get right.

RETCON ALERT: I came to my senses and restructured so that Book 3 now begins with Chapter 17, not Chapter 16. I don't know what I was thinking before.

I LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU. Please use the comments link at the end of the chapter to bring you back here or drop me email to talktooloose CAT toothdemon FRAUGHT net. That oughta fool the spambots for now.

Here's the chapter!

Here's the DOB homepage for earlier chapters!

Comments

[nat-dimension.livejournal.com]

Just...wow. I really, really...wow. And that's saying something, because I hate everything. More than anything else, it's been incredible to watch the development of the characters over such an event-filled stretch of my own life. Very, very...wow.

P.S. I LOVE the snippets of foreign language stuff (particularly with Doug), so if you were planning any more of those, they have my vote. That sounded weird, but languages are as much like crack to me as medicine.

[talktooloose.livejournal.com]

lol @ "hate everything"

I'm glad my characters' growth means something to you in your own time of change. I hope you all come out okay!

Yes, the foreign language stuff is fun as long as a I have the right technical support! My bf is Hungarian. Actually, my first draft wasn't too far off, so I'm kind of proud, but he tweaked it to be more idiomatic. Language is a big topic our house.

[mandlebars.livejournal.com]

Perfect, the connection between those two is absolutely spot on I don't think I've seen it verbalised so well.

I take it Kitty found out about the hot and heavy bedroom sessions? Well written again, I can sympathise with poor Bob

oh yeah dude it was hot to xx

[talktooloose.livejournal.com]

I was terrified about John and Bobby getting together because I didn't understand enough about how they would interact. Maybe that helped make their initial awkwardness more real. I'm enjoying writing the pairing now.

Kitty has no solid proof that something happened... but she's not stupid. Poor Bob, indeed.

Hot! Yay! Lux said he needed a cold shower.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_profiterole_/]

Happy Valentine's Day! It's great to see an update of DoB today. Well, it's always great to see an update of DoB. *grins*

I want to hug John and make all his insecurities disappear. He's doing better and better, thanks to Bobby and the other mutants at the Manor. Keep going like that, Bobby. <3 Also, the sexual connection between them is definitely hot. ^___^

I liked the scene with Jones too. Hopefully the TV will help him wake up.

And the rap. Priceless! :-)

[http://users.livejournal.com/_profiterole_/]

Have you read Hero by Perry Moore (http://users.livejournal.com/_profiterole_/65555.html)? If you haven't, I think it would definitely interest you.

[talktooloose.livejournal.com]

Heh, the Valentine's day posting was a coincidence. I don't really pay attention to the holiday. I didn't even get my boyfriend a card.

John is certainly learning a lot, but there are rocky times ahead, as you well know.

Thanks for the kind words. Writing bad rap is kind of cathartic.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_profiterole_/]

lol Well, that was a good date. ^^

Good luck to the boys! <3

[ayumie.livejournal.com]

Wow. There are no words for how much I love this fic. I love the forshadowing, the way you build up the tension, only to have it dissipate with a rap - for now. I know I've said this before, but your John is spot on. He and Kitty need to talk more. And is it too much to ask that Bobby keep his promise?

Oh, two minor typos, because I'm anal like that:

“God! you can’t even answer a simple question! Did something happen?!”
Shouldn't the 'you' have a capital Y?

Maybe the waffles weren’t agreeing him.
Me thinks we're missing a 'with'.

[talktooloose.livejournal.com]

Thank you! Fixed. I can only blame one on the betas as I added Kitty's line after their read.

Hmm, I don't know how much Kitty and John will talk in the near future. They are like two planetoids orbiting Bobby who come close to colliding during some of their orbits. However, both have long futures in the fic, so I'm sure they will take chips out of each other more than once!

I was re-reading some recent chapters tonight (notably 15) and the word "betrayal" comes up in connection with Bobby a frightening number of times.

[ms-jvh-shuh.livejournal.com]

Yay, new part! insta!comments ahead!

He hadn’t meant to hurt him. He was shocked he could!
You might want to remember that, you dork.

The tentative making of maybe-friends is awesome.


Hello, Andi!

"Magneto should hire me as his speech writer."
LoL
...sadly, I don't think that's what he's going to hire you for, Johnny-boy.

“You’re Lame!” John shouted at the screen and tried to wrestle the laptop away from Bobby. “Give me that! I have to tell him how he’s lame and should be killed slowly.”
“Everybody leave my computer alone!” Doug pushed them aside and slumped forward to cover the keyboard.
I'm laughing so hard here, even as I'm worried for what Derek's gonna do.

John not ready to go back to New York - totally understandable. I liked Scott here.

Great John/Jean interaction, too.

hooking Jones back on TV! Yay! (I... hope, at least?)

John suddenly wished he was there. He wanted to be standing up on stage with a flame ball beside the Professor, ready to take out anyone who dared try anything.
The similarity with X3. Oh God.

Whee Derek! Sooo much better than resorting to violence.

The buying of the shirt was perfect, especially with John wonderin if he'd lost all potential friends.

"“I want you to promise me. That you won't betray me. [...]I just need to know you won’t betray me, too.”
"I promise I won’t ever betray you, John."
“I believe you, I believe you, Bobby.”
So powerful.
...I'm not sure I can bear it when it all goes to hell.

- mayachain

[talktooloose.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the insta-comments.

I was laughing over the laptop wrestling, too!

How do you like that?! My Scott wasn't an asshole for a few seconds.

Glad the final scene worked for you. Lux was glad I threw in the "alien brain" stuff to lighten the mood in the middle.

[nexusofcrisis.livejournal.com]

Yes.
That is all.

[talktooloose.livejournal.com]

All right, he replies.

CONTINUED EXCELLENCE- THANKS!

[asm613.livejournal.com]

Great chapter. I am getting a little tired of Kitty's behavior towards Bobby- especially when she dished him to John- pretty much calling Bobby a betrayer. She's the one who lied to him to get him to save her boyfriend-putting his life in danger for her own personal pleasure. If anything Bobby should be blowing her off. She's the one who pressed him on to take part in her and lance's little 3 way adventure. Before Lance showed up she pretty much emasculated him when he wasn't turned on enough by her feminine wiles. She's the one who peer pressured him into smoking marijuana. She's mean and selfish and petty-and poor bobby feels guilty because she's a manipulating bitch.

I liked the way you wrote the ending. John asking Bobby not to betray him and John saying that he believed bobby. I think that had even more meaning than "i love you". The way you wrote that made us understand why that would mean so much more to John too. I liked the way you explained John's not wanting to go into the city; but not quite understanding why until Scott explained it to him. Could have done with less of the rally/demonstration. I didn't quite understand the point of the whole rapping Derek and Tonio with John and Bobby dancing on the roof-that's the only part I didn't enjoy or think was necessary.

You've put a lot of time and effort into this lengthy story. I don't like to wait for updates- but yours are worth it. I have to read the previous 1 or 2 chapters first, to refresh my mind- so that I can enjoy the new chapter in it's proper context/time frame. Thanks a lot for continuing to share this story with us

Re: CONTINUED EXCELLENCE- THANKS!

[talktooloose.livejournal.com]

I'm going to speak up in Kitty's defense. There is no doubt Kitty is manipulative, but she mostly does things because she perceives them to be right. She saw Xavier and the school unable or unwilling to save Lance from possible surgical butchery so she took matters into her own hands. The fact that she forced Bobby into it was wrong, but she could justify it to herself. So, no, I don't think it was for "her own personal pleasure".

Hmm... "emasculatedd him with her feminine wiles". Actually, I think she was trying to figure out why this young man wasn't really turned on when they were kissing. BECAUSE HE'S GAY!! A confusing situation that made her feel insecure.

In terms of the night when she and Lance and Bobby smoked up, if anything it was Lance who coerced both of them. In the end, Bobby was pretty damned pleased with the results and she was the one who ran from the room.

Kitty overdramatises her hurts and then is mean. But Bobby is not true with his feelings and that's hard to deal with.

Sorry you didn't like the protest. It's all part of my BWAHAHA master plan.

Chapter 19 is about half written in first draft. I had to rewrite the opening scenes three times until I got them right.

[underhardlove.livejournal.com]

DUDE YOUR STORIES ARE FUCKIN AWESOME